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Having noted what went on within the relationships, you could write about, think about or talk with friends how you might do things differently.

As you do this reflect on how you feel and whether you’re made anxious about assertive choices.

All of this may reveal deeper issues you feel would benefit from counselling – which you could pay for yourself or see if it’s available low cost or free via local mental health charities which you can find online or through your Citizens Advice or library.

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If you feel you are still affected by this you, or other readers, may seek help from the numerous organisations listed via This Is Abuse.

That was the last relationship and I’ve been single for a while but I don’t want to be alone. You’re not alone in struggling with relationships with ‘bad boys’. You’ve been in relationships with adult men who have chosen to abuse you emotionally, physically and financially.

Those misunderstood, loveable rogues that mainstream media, and often friends or family, tell us we’re powerless to resist. The good news is you already recognise you don’t want relationships like this in the future.

Cheeky chaps that only the right kind of woman can truly understand and care for. Can you go back over those past relationships noting down all the problems you encountered (some of which you’ve described here).

Then imagine if you were hearing about this from a friend? Next, consider what things all of these relationships have in common. Were there warning signs of abuse early on or did it come later? Are you also able to think about what happened from one relationship to the next?

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