Science dating jokes

I want you to make my favourite boiled beef and cabbage for the meal tonight and when I'm finished with that, I expect my favourite whiskey cake for afters.Then, you're going to draw me my bath so I can relax.These pages are the collected jokes from the Irish Culture and Customs Newsletters of previous years. This one is adapted from one sent in by Barry at Kellys in the Bahamas - thank you! He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees are a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the bedside table.If you would like to subscibe to our free Newsletter, enter your E-Mail address in the box in the right margin. He sits up in bed and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and ironed.And when I'm finished with that, do you know who's going to dress me and comb my hair? After just a few years of marriage filled with constant bickering, the Kerry couple decided the only way to save their marriage was to try counseling.When they arrived at the counselor's office, the counselor jumped right in and opened the floor for discussion. " Immediately, the husband held his long face down without anything to say.The following weekend he comes home a little tired but otherwise looking good. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked you to do?

I was walking in the village last October and I found this little package on the ground. The rich American couldn't undertand why the Irish angler was lying lazily beside his boat on the beach, smoking a pipe. The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem and gave him a book on assertiveness. By the time he reached his house, he had finished it.She was much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.The parish priest came to call on her one afternoon early in the spring, and she welcomed him into her little cottage. Then you would be a rich man like me." "What would I do then? "Then you could really enjoy life." said the American." Do you remember when I met you and you were only 16? The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring and sensitive. " The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did." As the garda makes out the second ticket for the illegal use of a radar detector unit*, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Woman ,didn't I tell you to keep your mouth shut!" The garda frowns and says "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. "The driver says, "Well, you see sir, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket." The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on.

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